As For Being Happy

Tonight I found something that I hadn't thought about in awhile, his name is Randy. Randy. . something. Yeah, I don't know his last name, how pathetic. The point is Randy, he has kidney failure. I've been so wrapped up in Darrin that I forgot about Randy, and now my thoughts can't stay off of him. Randy and I were together for a few months before he got sick and once he did I ran away because the thought of being with someone who I couldn't even save scared me. And it probably wasn't fair to him, to leave him like that but he accepted it anyway. And then he asked me if we could still be friends even though I would always mean more to him to then just friends. I didn't exactly know it would be this hard.
Actually, I am all one for being happy. Really. I mean looking back it's all, be happy it's a new year. .And I should follow my own advice but I'm terrified right now. It says it has been 21 days since Randy has even touched his facebook, myspace, etc and in those 21days he very easily could have died. No one knows about me, no one knows how much he means to me, therefore no one would tell me.
Dear Randy,
Please be okay, I need you.

Oh, speaking of needing. My mom hopped me back up on anti-depressants. Hmm.

Being Happy:2011

Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.Leo Tolstoy

There are many ways for people to be unhappy, but happy people have common characteristics. That’s why a good way to be happy is to learn the common characteristics of happy people and apply them.

So I studied what the great minds in history say about being happy. I went through hundreds of quotes on being happy and extracted the best lessons out of them. Not only are these lessons useful, they are also timeless in nature.

Here I’d like to share what I learned with you. Without further ado, here are 17 timeless secrets of happy people:

1. Forget the past

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.Rita Mae Brown

You won’t be happy if you carry the burden of the past. Did you make mistakes? Did you have terrible experiences? Whatever they are, you should let them go. There’s nothing you can do about the past, so you’d better let them go and focus your energy on the present.

2. Take responsibility for your life

The secret of Happiness is Freedom, and the secret of Freedom, Courage.Thucydides

To be happy you should have freedom and the most essential freedom is the freedom to choose. No matter how bad a situation is, you can always choose how you respond to it. People can annoy you, but it’s up to you whether or not you will resent.

But, as the quote above says, freedom takes courage. Freedom to choose requires the courage to take responsibility for your life. You shouldn’t blame someone else when something goes wrong. Take the responsibility and you have the power to choose.

3. Build relationships

Life’s truest happiness is found in friendships we make along the way.Unknown

Relationships is where we can get true happiness in life. The reason is simple: only through relationships can we love and be loved. Make relationships your top priority and you are on your way to true happiness.

4. Develop multiple passions

The more passions and desires one has, the more ways one has of being happy.Charlotte-Catherine

Passions lead you to happiness. So not only should you discover your multiple passions, you should also expand yourself to new passions. This way you will create new ways to happiness.

The key to expanding to new passions is curiosity. If you are curious, you will have an endless stream of exciting things waiting for you.

5. Build your character

Character is the basis of happiness and happiness the sanction of character.George Santayana

Building your character is essential for happiness. When you are true to yourself and others, you will be in peace.

The way to start building character is by making promises and keeping them. For example, you make promise to yourself that you won’t smoke. When you keep it, you are building your character. Or you make promise to others to be punctual. When you keep it, you build your character.

6. Be who you are

The summit of happiness is reached when a person is ready to be what he is.Desiderius Erasmus

You can only be happy if you become who you are. Don’t live other people’s life by trying to meet their expectations. People may expect you to have certain job or certain way of living but don’t be intimidated by them. Find who you are and be yourself.

7. Live your life purpose

The only true happiness comes from squandering ourselves for a purpose.William Cowper

To have a fulfilling life, you should find your life purpose and follow it faithfully. Find what matters to you and build the courage to follow it. Having a one-liner will help you internalize and communicate your mission.

8. Count your blessings

Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have.Unknown

Being happy is easy if we are grateful. Unfortunately, seeing what we don’t have is often easier than seeing what we have. Sometimes we need to experience loss before appreciating what we have. So don’t take things for granted. Look at what you have and soon you will have plenty of reasons to be happy. You may start with these simple things.

9. Have positive mind

It is not the place, nor the condition, but the mind alone that can make anyone happy or miserable.Roger L’Estrange

Happy people know how to control their mind. They don’t let negative thoughts come in. While a situation may seem bad to others, happy people look at them in a positive way. They always believe that no matter how bad a situation seems, there is always something positive to take from it. Your mind can make or break you, so guard it well.

10. Work creatively

Happiness lies in the joy of achievement and the thrill of creative effort.Franklin D. Roosevelt

When you work creatively on something you will find happiness. There is a well-known phenomenon regarding this called flow. When you are in the state of flow, you are fully focused on the task at hand that you no longer realize the passage of time. This state of flow allows you to achieve high productivity and being happy at the same time. Here are some tips to achieve it.

11. Start with what you have

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance, the wise grows it under his feet.James Oppenheim

Happy people don’t need something they don’t have to be happy. They don’t need certain job or certain level of income. Instead, they learn to be happy with what they already have. They have learned the art of contentment. Be content with what you have and you will be happy.

12. Change

They must often change who would be constant in happiness or wisdom.Confucius

Being happy requires you to constantly grow. In fact, the process of learning itself is essential for happiness. Have you ever felt the excitement of being enlightened about something? Have you ever felt the excitement of achieving a new level in life? Top 10 Things You Should Change in Your Lifegives you some practical tips on changing your life.

13. Use your talents

True happiness involves the full use of one’s power and talents.Douglas Pagels

There are two lessons to take from this quote. First, you should find your talents and second, you should use them to the fullest. Working in your talents is a sure way to enjoy your work because it’s something you are “hardwired” to do. Using your talents fully will make you even happier because of the satisfaction of doing your best.

14. Beware of small things

The happiness of most people we know is not ruined by great catastrophes or fatal errors, but by the repetition of slowly destructive little things.Ernest Dimnet

This is very true. Often it’s not big things that ruin your happiness. It’s the small things that do. Perhaps you don’t like someone or break some “small” promises. But even small leaks can sink your ship of happiness, so beware of them.

15. Distill your ambitions

Where ambition ends happiness begins.Author Unknown

While wanting to achieve more in your life is good, being obsessed by it is not. Do your best to improve yourself but don’t be obsessed by it.

16. Make others happy

Happiness is a perfume you cannot pour on others without getting a few drops on yourself.Ralph Waldo Emerson

This is my favorite secret of happiness. The way to being happy is to make others happy first. The more you help other people and make them happy, the more you will be happy. Happiness doesn’t come through selfishness but through selflessness. You reap what you sow.

17. Practice compassion

If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion.The Dalai Lama

Compassion is perhaps the highest level of selflessness we could have. As this quote aptly says, practicing compassion can make both others and you happy.

But of course, it requires practice. Start with thinking about the people around you. Look at their needs and find ways to meet them. Even if you don’t do it out of compassion in the beginning, your compassion will grow over time.

***

All in all, this quote by Aristotle can summarize the lessons above:

Happiness depends upon ourselves.

It’s you who decide whether or not you are happy in life.

I choose to be happy. What about you?

New Years

So, this new year is my year and my world. I hold it at the edge of my fingertips and it feels SO good. Being pissed off and rebellious if overrated, I'm going to be freakin' happy and love my life

Lead, follow, or get out of my. Watch out world, I'm coming through, nothing can stop me now. Hope is high and I'm going to cling to it, tie every string to it, give everything to it. How I'll do it who can say, but I know I will someday.Watch out world I'm on my way, nothing can stop me now.

Smile, baby, smile (: It looks good on you.

2011

in twelve hours i will love you, in twelve hours I will give you everything you have given me times twelve because every hour that I'm away from you I realize what I do wrong, and what you do right. My goals for this new year involve simply becoming a better person and proving to myself that I CAN make you happy.

Hmm, Respect.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

To respect a person is not possible without knowing him; care and responsibility would be blind if they were not guided by knowledge. 

As I see it, respect is something that is earned. One earns another's respect by voluntarily doing the things I mentioned above, such as taking that person's feelings, needs and thoughts into consideration.
Respect seems to be like a boomerang in the sense that you must send it out before it will come back to you. Respect cannot be demanded or forced, though sometimes people mistakenly believe that it can, fear and respect are two different things, two different entities if you will. Respect is something that requires dilligence and good amount of faith because to respect is to acknowledge and to accept. Without acceptance you cannot know, and without knowledge you cannot learn. You learn from the people you respect and you treat them with that security. Someone you respect is someone who makes you strong, better. Someone you respect you do the HONOR of not lying too, of not betraying. Respect cannot be faked, no matter how hard. Fake respect is misplaced honesty and virtue, respect for someone allows you to trust them and trust means no lies, no fallacies. Respect is something that cannot be forced, forced respect is fear and fear leads to hurt and pain. Someone you respect should never make you feel pain, betrayal, or disappointment. You cannot gain respect for a liar, liars are the epitome of evil. Why? Because lying requires lack of conscience. A lack of conscience allows someone to utterly detach themselves from reality and do what they know will hurt. Respect is something hard to come by, people think that you demand, push aside, MAKE respect. You can't. Respect is from the heart, a heart cannot be molded or broken into what someone else may want, a heart is unique to it's owner and a heart that can feel is a heart that can respect.

Why Twilight Sucks (:

 It’s offensive to the whole human race, there is too much face touching, and never once does it say the word ‘fangs’.  Millions of teenage girls are going to sit around, wasting away, waiting for an Edward. . but he doesn’t exist. Stephanie Meyer has brainwashed society. Either you love the vulnerable, obsessive, pale, want-to-kill-you boyfriend or you hate him and love the muscular, rugged, got-your-back best friend. And either way, you have a preference and that makes you brainwashed. And why? There is Bella Swan, which means beautiful swan and is ridiculously cheesy and a clear trait of a Mary Sue (been reading Tennyson lately, we all see what you did there!), who is clumsy, which might I add is not a flaw if Edward always catches her. And there is Edward, the flawless main character that has no deep thoughts except that Bella smells good. It is a co-dependent relationship stripped down to the bare essentials, girl “I love  you, I will change myself to be with you” and boy “I need you, I will kill myself if you leave me.” Bella’s only thoughts are “Edward is so perfect, I love him.” There is no other given reason why they love each other, she smells good and he is hot. That is teaching young girls everywhere that love is rather superficial. Another form of brainwashing, if you will, besides Bella has no goals and no future except Edward which is taking almost three hundred steps back and insulting women everywhere who fought for equality of gender. Stephanie Meyer is creating a series that is a prime example of an abusive relationship. I would never advocate for banning books, so my hope is for parents of Twilight fans to read these novels as well and discuss issues like domestic abuse, stalking, co-dependence, and the rest of Stephanie Meyer’s trickery with their teens because there is nothing ‘loving or cute’ about a guy watching you while you sleep when you don’t know he’s there.

And there are the stupid, not so serious reasons why Twilight inevitably sucks.

Despite her obviously trying, Valley author Stephanie Meyer writes horrendous pieces of literature that are not worth the paper they were printed on. Cracking open a thesaurus doesn’t make you an author.

 I want to hit Bella. Not only is the character of Bella lacking any sort of emotional depth, but she allows herself to fall into the arms of an effing vampire. Any sane person would be weary of the situation. Not only that, but she proceeds to continue a bizarre codependent relationship with him. This "I love you … but stay away from me … but come here anyway," BS that Edward pulls is just unhealthy. On that note
 I want to hit Edward. Mostly because he refuses to end Bella's life by finally feasting on the blood he's wanted for so long and thereby ending my misery. Go on! She's delicious.
Edward is sooooooooooooooooo hot! OMG! Edward is sooooo freakin' dreamy. You know how I know? Meyer makes hundreds of references to his beauty in the book. All the while, he lives up to being like most hot guys - completely vacant of personality. None of his creepy behavior (watching Bella as she sleeps, following her around so he can save her) would be tolerated if he weren't 100 percent supa-fine. Which leads to this. . .

Vampires sparkle! Who knew vampires were so flamboyant? Edward leads Bella to the top of a mountain, where he proceeds to take off his shirt to show her why he can't go in the sun. He's sparkly! Do you get it now Bella!? He can't go out into the sun because people will want to make handbags out of him! Despite that, Bella stares stupidly and tells him he's "beautiful." Surprise, surprise! Barf.

The movie has ruined two of my favorite bands. Muse and Radiohead are among the likes of likes Linkin Park and Paramore on the soundtrack. What!? The filmmakers went so far as to edit out a potentially risky Muse lyric in their song "Supermassive Black Hole." The opening line of the song "Oh baby don't you know I suffer? Oh baby can you hear me moan?" was edited down only to the first question. Because you can only moan during sex, you know.

Which is strange and apparently understandable,  because Meyer clearly thinks she's Bella. The plain, average character has five hot guys after her at any given time. Why? Because she's so virtuous and plain! Guys love that! Meyer would know.
 Bella sucks. And she's not even a vampire. She has no problem being a "strong" little sassy pants toward her parents, but she can't walk out the door without being victimized and therefore saved by the sparkly Edward.

And this: All Twilight fans are insane, proved by several responses to criticism such as… “What is your name, address and phone number, just so that i can track you down ank kill You with my super awesom vampire powers THAT I AQUIRED FROM READING THE SERIES!!!!!!!!!!”
62. And this… “do you WANT a cult of angry twilight luvers like mysef at your doorstep at night trying to behead you????? you shouldnt voice an absurd oppinion like this on the internet.”
63. And this… “you must have not read much good litterature in youre life, because if you cannot appreciate the quality of this art…..YOU ARE MENTALLY UNSOUND!!!!!!!”  (Of course, you’re right, my apologies, I shouldn’t dis this supreme magical LITTERature.

As you can see, none of this series really makes any sense, and has corrupted a world of teenage girls whos mind (and grammar) have been effected by reading these absurd books.  Eventually,  I’m sure, we will all see a mass criticism on her other books about creepy spirits trapped inside humans, I.E The Host. But I will save that for a later date (:

Ranks

So, today and yesterday have started out decent, not the mention last night was pretty fun. Snow makes everything happy-go-lucky. And then today, I get to sit here, very reminiscent of Tuesday, where I sat around being ignored for a game. Wohoo. Haha, yeah it's the most fun ever. Trust me on this one (: Anyway, Victoria. I love that girl, she makes me laugh. She is a lot like me but we are different, but alike, so the point still stands. She's finally getting herself off of her Jake Addiction, which is good. he's a waste of space and doesn't deserve to even have a spot in her mind.
All the world is screaming at me, stop, stop, stop, go.
All the voice laughing at me, yes, yes, yes, yes, no.
I realized last night as well that I needed to be better. I need to be more willing to compromise and make Darrin happier, and be more interested in things that he does. So, I agreed that we could go to his friend's New Years Eve Party. I figured that would be a nice first step, but I do have my limits. I'm really not one who likes to be put aside, especially when you say you aren't going to do something and then you do. I get it, it's what you do, sure. But still. .I mean can we at least pay a little attention here? That's not to much to ask right? But I'm not going to start any crap because that's pointless and will merely result in a fight, which I think we've fought enough over his stupid games.
No one said it would be easy did they? Being better never is, everyone knows that. But I shouldn't be the only one compromising, i mean I gave up my Tuesday to hang out with you and your friends, and then my Thursday as well? Just because it isn't a group of people all doing it doesn't make it okay. I don't think I'm overreacting. He knows how I feel about it, he knows full well. But hey, whatever. He'll do his things, I'll do mine. The end.


Moral of the story
Boys suck.