It Was Only A Kiss

I want to cry, all the time, I want to scream and cry and I just wish you would care because to be honest, you are the one breaking me apart with the words you think will make me fall into your arms. 

"It was a mistake, Mikky."

"No, it wasn't you made the same mistake twice."

"And I won't do it a third time, I realize what I had when I lost it."

"Good, I should have left the first time."

"I never meant to hurt you."

"Don't pull that shit with me, Michael. You wanted her and I wasn't her. She was blonde, she was blue eyed and gorgeous and she gave you everything I couldn't."

"She was a mistake!"

"So we're you."

"You don't believe that."

"Yes, I do."

"No, you really don't. Do you remember the time I came over and brought you that movie. . And we spent all night telling each other how much we loved each other?"

"No, I try to forget."

"Put it down."

"No! You made me broken. Why couldn't you have made me perfect?"

"Oh sweetheart, what makes you think you'll ever be perfect?"

"Fuck off."

"And when I do you'll just come right back. Come on, Mik. You know we won't ever be apart."

"I know. .I just wish you'd treat me better.

"And you think you treat me like a king? Think again, sweetie.

"I'm sorry. ."

"Good girl, come here."

"Okay. . ."

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I see it. I see how much you hurt me but I can't seem to find the motivation to leave you. I just let you do this, and it kills me. But I want you here, I want you here so badly I'll put up with you. I had you for ten months before you cheated and then two after that, a total of a year was spent with you and I'm not willing to give that up.

Maybe If Words Would Come Out Of My Mouth

If I could craft words like Mr.Darcy, I wouldn't be in this situation.

Maybe if you actually loved me, and listened to me, we wouldn't be so far apart...Don't blame me for you not being there to listen, when I gave you chance upon chance to be that one.

But right now, I don't even care because I don't even want you. My feelings have changed. But I'm not a princess, and this isn't what I had expected and in the end, I don't expect anything to happen. I'll just sit here and maybe someone, somewhere, someday, will realize my potential. I wrote this for you, but you'll never know that. Ha. <<<Look, I laughed. 

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you worry me at times
you're animated about everything but me
and my gut says that's not healthy
pluck up the courage and ask you
a question i don't know the answer to
and your reply is not satisfactory

i wanna do everything right
i wanna make the loose ends tight

when will i be more than a novelty to you?
when will i be more than a force to push you through?
i have potential too

you scare me at times
you're full up of phrases about what you can do
but it's me who's taking this flight
i can deal with turbulence
but i'm not dealing it out like you
so please bare me in mind

i wanna do everything right
i wanna make the loose ends tight

when will i be more than a novelty to you?
when will i be more than a force to push you through?
i have potential too

if i played all the right chords, would i strike a chord with you?
if i played all the right strings, could you pull some for me too?